Sunday, March 6, 2011

Sleepless nights......busy mind!!!!

So I haven't been sleeping well the last few nights. There is ALOT on my mind. These next few months are going to be super crazy!!!!

First of all, my weight loss surgery got moved up two weeks because of scheduling conflicts with the doctor. So my new surgery date is March 22nd which is only 2 weeks away. That's only 15 days or 360 hours away.....OMG!!!!!!!!! I begin my two week liquid diet on Tuesday. I have to admit that I am quite anxious about these two weeks. These 6 months of hoop jumping for insurance approval has forced me to admit that I have a food addiction. And as much as I thought I had defeated it, the thought of giving up some of my "comfort foods" after tomorrow makes me FULL of anxiety!!!! Now to those of you who have never had a food addiction, just skip ahead to the next paragraph because you suck I don't expect you to understand. I made a grocery trip yesterday to equip myself to be successful for these next two weeks. My fridge is now stocked with sugar free jello, sugar free pudding, skim milk, and water. The pantry is full of crystal light packets, grits, protein powder, and soups. Not a very exciting sounding menu especially for a two week long period. I am ready to do this. I know that with the support of my wonderful family and friends I am ready. I can't wait to be able to run with my child, exercise with my friends, not be worried about fitting in a booth at restaurant. I can do this. I will do this. My husband is worth it, my daughter is worth it, my other family members are worth it, my friends are worth it, but for the first time in my life I am taking the steps to say

I AM WORTH IT!!!!

I am also venturing out in another way this week. I am flying (for the first time ever) to New Orleans with a group of people from North Georgia College to the PDS conference. I am super excited about this new opportunity in my career to learn more about the partnerships between colleges and schools.

My mama got some not so great news this week. Because the chemo did not seem to be as effective as we originally thought, mama is going to have to undergo 33 radiation treatments. She will go everyday (Monday-Friday) for 6 1/2 weeks. She has several doctors appointments this week for check ups and to get the plan in place. I continue to have a grateful heart for the support from our family and friends and I also continue to covet your prayers. God has been with us through every step of this journey, and I know He will continue to be.

I'm signing off for now. The next time I blog, I'll probably be recovering from surgery and beginning my journey to my Heidi Klum body. LOL!!!